Tu i Teraz

My favorite juice here in Poland, Tymbark*, writes a little message to the drinker on the bottom side of each cap. This week as Elder Jackson and I enjoyed an apple-peach I read the top "tu i teraz" ("here and now"). 

* Tymbark juice is so good! They have crazy flavors like cacuts, mango, lemon-lime, pear, banana... na prawdę polecam!

Allison Bryan gave a talk in church a couple of years ago that touched me. She discussed the value of doing what we can and the lack of worth our grand plans have when we don't accomplish them. I was reminded of this talk by a Liahona article I read about a teacher who received a potato from a student because she didn't have an apple. The message of the article was about how we need to give now: the potato, even if it's not what we want rather than waiting in the hopes of giving more later: the apple. Sister Bryan listed some examples in motherhood of how doing what we can is better than not doing what we wish we could, and in district meeting I adapted the idea to missionary work. For example, the simple compliment I give to my friend is better than the ornate, moving letter I don't find the time to write. The specifics will change for each of us but the template is useful - doing what we can now is better than the "seemingly better" alternative we cannot provide. We cannot wait to serve those around us until we have no problems, a ton of free time, or all of the resources we hope for - giving our potato is often all we need to put forth. 

Being more in the moment is needed. As a missionary we plan all the time - planning is vital - but it can be easy to focus on the future or past too much. Little things like taking pictures of a beautiful building - at times I tell myself that we can come back and look at it another day when we have more time but it never happens. Life is busy but I want to make mine less rushed and fuller.

I've been needing this little bottle cap message to remind me to change. I have wondered what I've been and I think it's safe to say that I've been depressed. We use the word differently, sometimes flipantly but for me depression comes when we feel confused and often indifferent. I have felt no vision or purpose for a time and it's toxic. This past week's zone conference helped me snap out of it.

This past week Elder Jackson and I went to Warsaw for his legal work and were able to meet up with Daniel, someone I met with a couple of times when I was in Żoliborz. He showed us the rynek and a view point in the old town. We had a good conversation about God, very natural with meaningful questions. At the end of our chat he seemed to be surprised how we, of different faiths and backgrounds, could help one another understand Heavenly Father better and understand the role we have in this mortal excursion. 

Later in the week, on Sturday we had zone conference, gathering with so many missionaries is the best! I was able to see so many beloved faces and remember the true friendships and bonds I have built. Feeling such love for others was significant in getting me out of my "depression" / "funk". From the conference I was inspired to be a greater spiritual influence and to pray for others more. The way I am praying is changing and having a prayer in my heart is more real - having Heavenly Father with me all the time. I have learned how to account for the day with God at the end of each day and I think that this can be a process. Sometimes it stresses me out to try and remember everything and have a productive prayer at the close of a day but prayer should also never be saved for later. In little ways I am starting to pray for others more often and throughout the days as they enter my mind and heart. For example, as I sat at the window of our train admiring Poland's countryside I remembered the loving family I met on my first train ride up north. I shared my gratitude as well as my hopes for this family - right as the emotions were relevant and with me. 

Gdańsk is my home, going back to Warsaw having been there for 8 months was a treat but getting back here felt so good - it's where I'm stationed right now and I love it. My district is full of the best missionaries! Things with the branch are good too, Dawid taught in the priesthood meeting yesterday and invited Kuba and Arek (the two who were at his baptism). His testimony at the end was powerful and honest, I sat listening admiring the large painting of Christ and John the baptist in the River Jordan (the one I grew up with on my bedside table) and felt so grateful to see Dawid grow and already influence others for good, a promise made to him during his confirmation. 

With love,

Starszy Kimball

"They became new creatures" Mosiah 27:26

Our week included a lot of knocking on doors and last night we ended on a sort of sour note with old people threatening to call the police and then a young dad scolding us for knocking when his kids were sleeping. I avoid contention as much as possible, I never like to try and argue my message upon anybody. This week there are a couple moments of contention when those we approached (whether on the street or in their home) had a bad reaction and I didn't like it. 

I've never really been surprised when people ignore us, I would have ignored me too before my mission. When people take offense at what we do though it can make me question what we are doing and how we are doing it. The truth is that "normally" we would be annoying and invasive, which is how many view missionaries. However, for those who are searching and have had their heart opened the experience is completly different. The Spirit changes everything. Recently, I have been able to notice the difference in my life when I accept the Spirit into my life and when I close myself off. When the Holy Ghost is present there is that "magical" change - any worries and strife, all of the questions from pondering and philosophizing are calmed. Our ways and God's ways really are different. We, as people, can come up with a lot of greatness but it will never match our Heavenly Father's power. Man's reasoning and understanding is base and can be so destructive if we let it blind us rather than let it bring us closer to God. 

The Spirit is what changes the situations we are in, it is what changes us. I am grateful for the personal power of the Spirit and what He does for me, communicating God's will and Christ's peace to my soul. We really become different people, "new creatures", when we have the Spirit with us. 

Confusion and worry is not of God so if you want to expel it from your life, pray. 

This past week was a lot better, I'm a little dead at the moment hence the lack of information or much depth in this message. To reiterate what I learned this past week - we need the Spirit to have ture, lasting peace - invite the Spirit by 1. learning of what Christ's role means 2. serving others 3. simple praying.

Starszy Kimball

Last week's post: Letting darkness in

The Atonement.

In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints our prime focus is Christ's Atonement. For us this is when Christ suffered in Gethsemane, suffered and died on the cross, and then rose again resuerrected on the third day. From experience I truly am convinced that Jesus Christ not only suffered for our sins and guilts but also for our pains, misunderstandings, frustrations - all of it. I believe in this so strongly because the help I have been given can only be given from one who personally knows and understands me in an intimate way nobody else understands. 

I wrote last week about the trials I've been having. At the beginning of this week I fell into, potentially the lowest, depression of my mission. I usually describe the influence of the adversary as: confusing, heavy, dark. This was all true, at times my mind felt explosive with no peace and particularly darkness seemed to be cast over me. There are real trials I faced and real issues that I need to overcome - that being said I learned an incredible lesson during district meeting this past week. 

We were all writing down what the Atonement means to us and as I thought about my current predicament I knew Christ's love however wasn't entering my heart, I learned that in order for the healing power of the Atonement to take effect we must accept it. Pride prevents us from relying on Christ and it is so destructive. Missions break us down, all missionaries here talk about the humbling process.

Jesus Christ does not condemn. Repentance isn't being punished for sins - this past week I learned about this principle in a new way. It's funny how when I felt down without self respect realizing my weaknesses was just what I needed. There was a clear moment when my conscience accepted that there were things I was doing that needed to be corrected and that is when I started to realize the freeing power of repenting - all enabled thanks to the Atonement. Sin weighs us down and we can be ignorant to it, when it seems that other forces are pushing us over and repentance lifts and frees. 

Truth is tricky to correctly and fully express but it comes through experience as our understanding expands. I am surprised how when I more deeply come to know truth the same words and explanations are used, even the same answers apply despite the personal and different situation of feelings and events. 

God really does love us because there are light filled miracles even in the midst of darkness. He provides a way to bring the light back into our lives. At times, when people ask certain questions ex. "Do you believe only Mormons will be saved?" I think about the narrow nature of the path back to our Heavenly Parents. Times when I struggle let me see Heavenly Father's infinite mercy, and thanks to Christ's grace I no longer worry about the justice system of the universe. We are in perfect hands.

 I feel blessed that throughout this dark week I've been motivated to work, not out of guilt or lingering expectations but a sincere desire to serve others. Now though I am more effective - I have a vision again with a purpose feeling a stewardship for the work and connecting with people.

We aren't working with any investigators but Patryk, Dawid and Irek are incredible. 

I wish I could express what I experienced better, deeper, more completely but luckily, I know understanding comes when we are personally close with our Savior.

Just so you all know I am doing well :) I am not magically out of the dark pit but I am trudging upwards. Happiness is a choice and I want to be more humble and accept help more fully in my life, especially from my Redeemer.

Starszy Kimball

The Potter's Clay

Perfectionism. Missions are hard. Perfectionism is a tactic of the adversary. Peace and clarity are in reach but we must actively seek them.

To put things simply I have faced some discouragement this past week. A common weakness I have met time and time again is self-critism. During these times I feel overloaded, inadequate, confused. Negative perfectionism is destructive and nevers stops amazing me in the ways it manifests itself. Another common theme I drone on about is time as the enemy.

In life, and I will say especially as a missionary, there are a lot of expectations. There are a lot of guidlines, a lot of advice, and different ideals. With so many expectations from outside sources it is easy to feel the pressure, things can become forced and motives become blurry. Then Satan plants thoughts of self doubt and things go downhill. There are some truths and lessons I have learned this past week: 1. Take the time needed to get yourself into a good place. There are too many to-do's on our lists and too many opportunities that we pass up because we try to push through when we cannot. Trying to execute all that we have to do when we are not in the state to do it is not the answer. Ever since President Uchtdorf came I have been striving to be the "Captain of my time" but understanding what that really means is taking time. It is important and worthwhile to spend the time to take care of ourselves so that we can more quickly be back to helping others. 2. Again, life is full of this next issue but as a missionary it's much clearer to me. With so many expectations and ideals going around a clear vision of our goal can be cloudy. Life, behavior, actions can become forced - sincerity and identity are lost. It is so important in life and in missionary work to be natural. We need to trust that Heavenly Father is leading us to have experiences, weaknesses, strengths, and talents that will help us fulfill the specific role ahead. Desires, what we do, and who we are should all come from the heart. 3. Here is a major one! Don't find contradictions in sources of truth. There are seeming contradictions at times, for example the scriptures teach us to work with all of our heart, might, mind, and strength but also intrsucts us not to run faster than we have strength. In Alma's own ministry as a missionary (a prophet from the Book of Mormon) is tells of times he took Amulek home to rest and other times where Alma saw the work ahead and was so excited he could not think of rest. We have scriptures, friends, revelation - so many sources of truth and answers all around us. At times it can seem confusing, like maybe we are getting mixed signals. Heavenly Father is constant and full of light - depending on circumstance, person, and Heavenly Father's vision for each of us different principles of truth will affect us at different times. The quality of balance is needed here. (Balance seems to be the theme of my mission so far or at least the journey in finding how to achieve balance) 4. We need to rely on others. Communication is a healing balm to the open sores of anxiety and worry. Our experiences are surprisingly similar in this mortal path we endure along. I am so grateful to see how relying on others, even those I wouldn't have thought I would but thanks to the mission I have, has helped me. As we talk and share with one another we gain personal assitance. We are able to air problems and confide in friends our hardships. We can seek and attain wise council and hear the experiences of those that go through the same things as us. The secret to success if not going forward alone. 5. This leads to the next point, relying on Christ. Don't forget God's true nature. I most frequently do this when I have a negative self image. It's funny how we can feel unworthy, scared, and a lack of desire to talk with our Heavenly Father. One of my favorite questions to ask people is what they think Christ's perception of them is when they sin or mess up. They often think about it and rarely do they give the answer that my experience seems to point to. When we think of Christ we think of light, mercy, grace, and love. As I said God is constant so these attributes never falter. I know that Heavenly Father will never give us condemning revelation or answers - of course correction and inspiration to improve and better live up to our potential but feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness will never come from our Loving Parent.

Heavenly Father truly is the potter and he is giving us all that we need to become the best version of ourselves. Sometimes we set unrealistic expectations or even simply we set expectations for what some say is perfection even when it doesn't agree with our hearts. I know that following our hearts doesn't mean doing what feels easiest, most pleasurable, or most convenient but it is the way we can tap into our purest, most Chrislike selves. Christ is an Enabler. I hope to devote sufficient time and resouraces to accomplish the Lord's vision for me focusing on correct priorities and relying on those around me, especially My Redeemer.

This week we had a ton of miracles!

We met Nikodem, a young guy who recently graduated from school and is now working in gdańsk, on a white board New Year's Day and met with him on Saturday. He is genuine, faithful, and searching. We had a terrific lesson and he is excited to read of the Book of Mormon, I have a lot of hope.

Irek was baptized six years ago in Wrocław but hasn't been to church in a while. He recently, moved to Gdańsk and feels the need to return. He called us New Yaer's Day as well and he was in church yesterday, he is a great guy and his testimony has never faltered.

We had some cool conversations while finding this week. Yesterday Elder Jackson and I were invited into a home to share our message. Three moms were sitting around a table with tea and cake while their kids played in the other room, they had all been to church together and were now socializing, ready to talk with us. Basia, Gosia, and Agnieszka are all protestant, faithful followers of Christ. It was one of the most complete teaching opportunities where we taught, explained, testified and were extremely bold. They weren't interested in the end, mainly because of the Book of Mormon (another book of scipture other than the Bible), but it was a super cool experience. Gosia works for an organization that helps families and gave me a book about Christ in return for the Book of Mormon I left. We all believe in the same Good and the same Christ it was a blessing to see the truth we all shared and although there were some key principles they rejected to even pray about I feel like we had an impact - they surely had an impact on me.

Despite the struggles there is so much good and so many miracles all around. Happy 2015 everyone :)

Starszy Kimball

Last Week's Letter - December 29, 2014 - The Brazen Serpent

For what ever reason I spaced today and almost forgot to write my weekly message. I would like to share a couple special experiences I had this past week (and no not the one where an old, little man chased me out of his hallway with a meter stick raising it to strike as I tried to finish my conversation with the lady next door to him...#tracting)

This past week was full. We were busy, traveling to a ton of different cities, having conferences, Christmas celebrations and so on. I felt a little stressed and that subtle cloud of darkness was hanging over me. I prayed for Christ's love. During the missionary Christmas zone conference we sang a ton of carols, in the middle of Angels We Have Heard On High I was overwhelmed with the Spirit. A simple and clear message was placed in my heart, Jesus Christ loves me and that love is enough to remember my worth. The history of the brazen serpent is shared and quoted in the scriptures and it has recently been a huge thought in my mind. Gaining the Savior's grace is so simple and easy but we are somtimes too prideful to busy to see what we need to do. I know that a simple prayer and an honest searching heart suffices to receive a confirmation of the specific love Jesus Christ has for you. A very special moment and conference.

I am very glad that I was able to skype with my family on Christmas - it was a lot of fun. My mom was joking about a list of "21 questions to ask your missionary this Christmas" and one of them was "what was the last miracle you had". Luckily, my family didn't put me on the spot where I had to answer but it got me thinking. The most recent one had been just early that Christmas day. I have been searching to feel real unity with other missionaries not only in being friends but unity in the work. While the district was taking a tram to the Shaws (the Senior couple here in Gdańsk who feed us all the time - they are so kind and loving!) I noticed Sister Wood striking up a conversation with a lady sitting behind her. It was simple but seeing her kind face, hearing the Polish sounds, seeing the buildings out the window behind gave me what I was looking for. There is a great bond between missionaries all around the world, and there is a special bond between us in that same country, and especially the same city. I am grateful for the missionaries here, they are an irreplacable support and I love being able to do missionary work with them. Life is good.

Szczęśliwego Nowego Roku! Remember that change is real, change involves making the same mistakes over and over again but not giving up. Believe in yourself but don't rely exclusively on yourself. 

Starszy Kimball

Merry Christmas!!

Dawid is doing so well. This week Elder Platter had to say his goodbyes and then two days later it was an introduction for Elder Jackson. Dawid is seriously thinking about how a mission fits into his plans. When we met with him he prayed for the members in the branch, he is now officially a part of things. He is going to Italy for Christmas but when we comes back he will receive the Aaronic priesthood. He is ready to have some responsibility and part in the branch, it is incredible to to see. He has become a good friend as well, just yesterday we were having a pretty deep conversation about the future. I'm grateful for my time in Gdańsk.

This past week was a lot of fun! I went to Warsaw and spent the night with Elder Garrett and a few other trainers. It was a ton of fun to be back in Warsaw - being there for one night and at Christmas almost felt like a little vacation. There was a lot of excitment and energy on Wednesday as we had the trainer meeting and then went to the mission home and were paired up. I love pointing at the map announcing where we will be serving and then have President Edgren call one of the new missionaries. Elder Jackson is here with me now. He is fresh out of high school (so like me a year ago) and is excited to be in Poland. He is out going and willing to talk with people, he is a lot of fun and I love introducing him to all of the new joys of being a Poland Warsaw missionary.

We have a new district, Sister Grgich and Sister Wood stayed but Sister Bąk came up to make a tripanionship. It has been a lot of fun, enjoying the Christmas market and old town in Christmas decor. Today we are in Toruń a city near Bydgoszcz and will spend the night with missionaries caroling. Then tomorrow we will travel to Poznań for a Christmas zone conference. It is beautiful and so much fun!

I am excited to talk with my family on Thursday! Remember not to be stressed but enjoy this time with family and friends.

Wesołych Świąt! Merry Christmas :)

http://www.mormon.org/pol/bozenarodzenie

( it is also in English of course - so good, watch it! polecam ciepło :)

Starszy Kimball


LAST WEEK'S LETTER: Dawid's Baptism and the importance of apologizing and forgiving

Well my weeks as a missionary are always full of exciting events such as a movie night after English class (airing the restoration movie complete with popcorn and drinks) or attending an Australian presentation Sister Grgich did at a local library. There are unique opportunities and experiences, I will focus on the highlights:

First things first Dawid's baptism and confirmation. Saturday morning we wake up and get ready. We met at the Dwór Prawdzica, a Renaissance themed hotel, by the sea for the baptismal service and ordinance (meaning the meeting as well as the baptism itself). Most of the branch was present, President and Sister Edgren drove up, one of the sisters investigators, and then Dawid and his friends Arek and Kuba (who we have met a couple of times). As I took Dawid to get changed into white he was telling me how nervous he was feeling but excited too because he knew he was starting his journey as a disciple of Christ. I was thankful to be there to help support and encourage him before the meeting began. Things ran promptly and smoothly. I gave a brief talk about baptism and Elder Platter shared a short talk about the Holy Ghost. The pool was neck height so when President Kempa (the branch president) baptized it wasn't difficult for Dawid to be fully immersed. He walked out and I handed him his towel, he took me aside and said that he felt something when he was in the water. After they changed and returned to the hall we met in Dawid shared his testimony. He relayed his experience when a priest once mentioned that we are all in search of the path to Christ. Dawid knew that was true, that he was searching and now that he has found it. He understands that this is the first step, not the last. He has had trials, temptation, and adversity along the way but he has deepened faith in Christ, overcame smoking and repented of past sins, was baptized and then confirmed. In church yesterday during the confirmation blessing Dawid was promised that by his example he would help others come unto Christ. He is an incredible example to me and to us all. It's always a reminder to me how quick and simple baptisms are -especially the time in the water. It is a beginning, the start of service, self-improvement, and becoming like Christ. It was a blessed experience.

My birthday was another highlight. We spent the afternoon going to lunch with the Sisters and then planning for the baptism. In the evening I was surprised by Dawid and Elder Platter with a party at Dawid's (consisting of the three of us). Dawid made his "famous spaghetti" and they got me a Gdańsk souvenir I've been wanting. It was a such fun day, I was surrounded by thoughtful friends. Many messages and notes made my day all the better.

Transfer calls were this past Saturday, unlike usual we got them live, in person at the baptism. I will be staying here in Gdańsk training for a second time. I felt it coming, that being said my focus has been so involved in the baptism that I haven't thought about the upcoming transfer yet. The past couple of days it's been sinking in and I am trying to gear myself up. I get to welcome another missionary to Poland: introduce them to the food, the people, the work. The beginning of my mission seems an eternity ago, I have gone through so much and so many changes. I will be at the same point in my mission that Elder Godwin was when he trained me. Pretty fun. 

My last thought for now... This last weekend was incredible but the week leading up to it was one of the hardest of my mission. To put it simply there was drama and I assert that contention is one of the most toxic influences in the world. The anxiety and stress I had, the physical discomfort so tangible - I don't want it in my life. I am still working on softening my heart to forgive but there was a miracle amongst it all. On Sunday morning I approached the person that we had experienced difficulty with. It was just the two of us and I asked if I could say something. I simply said that I wanted to apologize. I didn't try to explain every little misunderstanding. It can be hard, so hard - pride gets in the way and I didn't want to admit I had something to be sorry for (because of course from each of our views we were the victim - as it always is) but my heart was blessed with sincerity as I spoke. I simply shared the feelings and lack of peace that had filled me week and how I was sorry for my part in it. I didn't lie or say what I thought the other person wanted, I spoke from my heart. The immediate peace and Spirit that I had lacked but hoped for in the past week flooded over me. Apologizing is so important, it is freeing - as I apologized I began to forgive as well. At times when thoughts enter my head my heart hardens and its beat quickens with anger but when we are sincere and apologize Heavenly Father comes in and fills our heart with the love we lack. If we want to forgive others, show them love - just as we can't hide from Heavenly Father in sin he knows our hearts in when we are found in innocence even when others don't see it. By promptings from the Holy Ghost we can know what to do and where we stand before our Father in Heaven. 

Enjoy the Christmas season :) Thanks to Christ light and peace are possible in our life in overcoming darkness and confusion.

Wesołych Świąt,

Starszy Kimball

Change it!

Gdańsk is covered with Christmas - lights everywhere and Jarmark (the Christmas markets) are finally up! The district is as tight as ever, we continue to have adventurous P-day excursions and unity in the work. 

I don't have a bunch of time this week and am not in the most write-a-letter mood so here are my condensed thoughts:

Dawid has had some pretty incredible experiences. This past week he faced trials: be it doubt, self-doubt, ridicule from others, confusion etc. He described it as feeling everything at once. There was a darkness, a confusion over him and it was visible. He sent a text on Friday sharing his feelings of feeling unprepared. It was a big surprise but then after the events of the weekend Heavenly Father's hand in it all is clear. We were able to address his issues and then when he asked if there was some magical way he could get help to quit smoking (he repeated the question clarifying that he didn't want dark magic but wished that there was a "light" magic). We then explained the priesthood as God's power and he asked for a blessing, afterward he had a smile on his face. At the end of the meeting another visible metamorphosis had taken place. He enjoyed culture night with us and was able to relax Saturday night.

He was running late to church on Sunday, we were worried it but then it had turned out that he forgot his wallet and didn't notice until he was on the tram. He seemed to get some answers at church and received a lot of support. Our members have welcomed him in. Waldek, a member of over twenty years (so has seen the growth and dwindling of the church in Gdańsk), called Sunday afternoon and shared how excited he was for Dawid and told us his desire to take Dawid under his wing and be a spiritual mentor and support in this difficult new life. Waldek is not the exception. At the end of all the Sunday meetings he said that his mind felt clear. The difference in my life from the influence of the Adversary and of the Holy Ghost is identical. My favorite word to use when I describe how I recognize the presence of the Spirit is clarity. He found peace and surety and is more confident thanks to his experiences. I'm grateful for our opportunities in overcoming struggles to grow. 

I've been thinking about what I want to change this next year. President Edgren's invitation to sacrifice has been on my mind a lot recently. I want to sacrifice having a bad attitude. There are parts of missionary work that stress me out or I plainly don't care for. Similarly, in life there are aspects we dread or worry about it. This is normal and positive stress pushes us to develop but I'm ready to cut out the unneeded anxiety. Rather than avoid or let problems fester in my mind I want to address them full on and change them. Why do we allow ourselves to have these yearly, monthly, or even weekly and daily dreads? I am over it. Even when things seem out of my control I want to adapt to the situation. The need for our positivity, love, and service is infinite and we can't afford to be caught up with things that don't really do not matter but have a knack for weighing us down. We can't help others if we don't first take care of ourselves and when we are in a situation to look beyond ourselves we will see the need and be guided in caring, thoughtful service as we seek the loving direction from our Father in Heaven.

Enjoy the Christmas season! Share your belief in Christ and if you don't have one then listen to somebody who does. Share your love with those around you.

Kocham swojego Zbawiciela i wiem że doskonale nas rozumie i też nas kocha. Miłego tygodnia!

Starszy Kimball

Never pass up an opportunity to do good

A week of miracles:

On Wednesday evening we had a lesson with Gosia and Martyn (a young couple in the branch) after our English class. As we made our way over we caught a tram that said it went to the right stop but we discovered that it went around the city to get to it so we got off at another stop to catch another one. We looked at the schedule and saw that we needed to catch a 2 then saw one pull up close but stop. A moment later a tram pulls up and we hop on. As we are riding I'm noticing that we didn't reach certain stops that I thought we would but because we were going a new way I didn't think much of it. Then all of a sudden it hit me that we were not where we needed to be so we get off at the next stop and see that we had boarded a 3 instead. As I made my comment before getting off the tram Elder Platter said there must have been a reason, I was then surprised by how quickly the need for our detour manifested itself. We find our bearings and realize we are in a settlement near the coast and see one guy on the platform we were on. I walked over to him asking the best way to get to our destination and as he begins to reply he stops and asks "Mormon?" I responded that we indeed were and he continued that he just moved to the area from Ukraine. He'd been meeting with missionaries to learn English and was hoping to get in contact with missionaries here - it must have been a sincere desire because Heavenly Father led us 40 minutes out of our way to find him. We exchanged information and I hope to see him this Wednesday. Meeting Sergiej brought the spirit into our evening and was a confirmation of Heavenly Father's hand in the work. There was then a kind babcia placed in our path to guide us to the Chabros family's home, Heavenly Father is intricate and caring in His purposes. 

One morning this week I wasn't feeling on my game and I noticed that it was because my heart had become a little hardened. I had some anger and frustration with my companion as well as with the branch president here because of some miscommunication and other matters. I've been working on not giving in to feelings of anger or annoyance but as we all can attest it isn't easy. During personal study I slipped into the bedroom in a down and some-what delicate state to pray for strength to be more loving. What I felt is hard to describe. Immediately I was reminded of Heavenly Father's love for me as well as Christ's. I thought of how the Atonement of Christ has led me to receive forgiveness and see growth in myself. As love was poured into my heart I began to feel it soften and my perspective of the whole situation flipped around. Simply, my heart was filled with love and it didn't matter what had been said or been done because my heart had been softened, it had been changed. This is one of the most powerful experiences I have had, it's a testimony to me that the Christ is the Savior. He understands perfectly what we need and His love allows us to be better and love others. Love truly is a gift. Dawid explained how we can know if this is all true yesterday when talking to a guy that comes to church often but doesn't believe it's true with the words, "can't you feel it in your heart?"

Dawid is committed to being baptized the 13th of December, he caught a train at 6:00 am yesterday from his grandparents place to make it to church here in Gdańsk. He is changing his life, recently quitted smoking, and is ready to accept the new lifestyle we are teaching him. The gospel is logical to him but I am convinced that the reason it's so easy for him to adjust is because of what he feels in his heart.

The branch here has had trouble feeling love amongst themselves. On Sunday I taught the combined hour of church. I based the lesson off of President Monson's talk "Love - the Essence of the Gospel. It seemed to intrigue them, great comments were shared, and unlike when I gave my first talk in sacrament meeting, everyone seemed engaged. It's a topic on everybody's mind right now. We had a branch dinner and Christmas tree decorating activity on Saturday and then church yesterday, the atmosphere is feeling better than ever before. Something that many members see a need of is an example to inspire the branch, the sad thing is that they don't understand that they can be that shining example. We need to be the example of love and goodness to those around us. Having good desires and hopes is positive but actually accomplishing good brings a change. As Camilla Eyring (my great grandma) said, "Never pass up an opportunity to do good." I highly recommend that anyone interested in being more loving read/ watch the talk: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/04/love-the-essence-of-the-gospel?lang=eng&media=video#watch=video

Heavenly Father is a God of miracles and love.

Here I end wishing my love, 

Starszy Kimball

Astonishing

I am flying right now, what a week! 

Dawid is officially the most incredible person I've met and so much happened with him this week! 

On Thursday we met with him and Martyn, a young, newleywed in the branch, accompanied us. We talked about receiving answers from God so explained personal revelation. He had read from the Book of Mormon and prayed every day. In the lesson we helped him realize that he had received an answer and he admitted that he believes the Book of Mormon and church are true. He said that we wants to join so we invited him to be baptized on December 13th and he agreed! 

We then saw him on Sunday at church, he was there in his white shirt. Later that day he talked about the good atmosphere he felt. After church we had a lesson with Waldek, a member for 20 years. He shared some of his story and some powerful personal expeience and life lessons. We talked about the word of wisdom again and Dawid committed to live it. We talked about self integrity, doing things because we want to and because we feel personally committed to ourselves and to Heavenly Father. We taught about the power in making a decision and sticking to it, relying on Christ for help and strength. 

Yesterday it was also Dawid's birthday and he invited us over to his place to celebrate - we were a little unsure because we didn't want to enter a college party but we stopped by and there was a small, calm group. We had cake and talked, it was a lot of fun. Dawid was telling his friends about him joining the church and how he doesn't drink anymore. It was a cool setting to start really becoming friends with him. He asked me if I was related to Heber C Kimball, he has been reading about the church history on mormon.org and came across the name. He loved the tie we gave him. He said that he's already talked to his dad about his baptism and he's supportive. 

I feel like I am doing a terrible job of explaining it all and leaving so much out but to put it simply, Dawid is excited to be baptized, he is really changing to prepare himself, and we couldn't be happier. All of my prayers, studies, and thoughts are focused on him right now and helping him to be ready. The members were great at welcoming him yesterday. I simply feel blessed to be a part of this. Thank you so much for your prayers.

Among this we had a full week. Elder Whiting came down and we had an amazing time being reunited! We were able to talk and offer support, just like in the MTC. I've missed my Elder Whiting therapy. We went out contacting and it was fun to be so excited with another missionary to go out and find and teach! We had an inspired lesson with Justyna, a girl in her 20s, and then were able to help a guy change a flat tire. It was just an awesome exchange.

When Elder Platter returned we immediately were laughing and having fun, being friends with a companion and having missed them when they leave for a couple of days is such a blessing. We went up to Gdynia for the first time (the top city of the tri-city area) to visit John, the Nigerian member at the marine university. We met up with him at his dorms and met a bunch of his friends from this group who are in this course. It was a party, so much fun! Elder Platter made the comment that even despite the food Nigeria would be an incredible place to serve because of the people! I was able to have a cool conversation with Jason, we are excited to return and get to know them better. 

I feel like I should have more to say, having had one of the most packed weeks of my mission. MY spiritual counsel for today is to be astonishing. As I'm reading in Alma people are constantly "astonished" by the missionaries. The love, the spiritual power, and thoughtfulness of the missionaries I've worked with is astonishing. Go and serve and love those around you, love them when it doesn't make sense, when it doesn't seem fair. Serve others and pray for a heart overfilling with love leading to acts that will shock others because of the selflessness you show. President Edgren has asked us to create a plan of action for 2015. I'm working to create it and it's heading is to be astonishing - not because I'm the best or most talented in anything - because of the love I emanate by the way I love and the person I am. Commit to yourself and to God and have that personal integrity. 

z wyrazami miłości,

Starszy Kimball